Category Archives: Humour

Rental Agreement

Well that time has arrived again, middle child, the “young adult” has moved out. She has secured herself full-time employment in another city approximately forty-five minutes away. Her new job is with the same company her older sister works at, so naturally the older sister (and her boyfriend) offered her a room in their home.  Before the younger sister could officially move in, the older sister had to come up with a rental agreement for the younger sister to sign. Here is the “Residential Tenancy Agreement” middle child signed:

Rental Agreement

Rental agreement between the eldest, her boyfriend & middle child.

Vagina Lips

A couple of weeks ago I received a magazine in the mail, and on the front cover was a lovely image of a model’s face. The only problem was she was wearing a bright red lipstick. Now I love the true colour of red, I should, I’m a redhead, but when it comes to red lipstick, I absolutely abhor it. Generally I do not like lipstick, I don’t enjoy the feel of it, or the fact lipstick never, ever says on, and the worst is the impression it tends to leave on glassware when you are having a drink!

So when I saw this model wearing red lipstick, it once again led to one of the many conversations I have with my husband, as to why I don’t like this or that, and why he doesn’t either. His response about the lipstick was ‘it’s like you are wearing a vagina on your face, and something to the effect that he prefers a vagina to be down there’. Gross, right? Yep. I must say though, I did burst out laughing when he said this, only because, well the visualization.

Jokingly I said I was going to Tweet his comment, and of course (knowing my husband so well) he said, go ahead. So I did, but I made one huge mistake, I used the word hate. Hubby did not say hate when he told me the reason why he doesn’t like red lipstick. The first person who responded to me, said that’s pretty hateful, whereas the second “gahh, I will never look at red lipstick the same way, ugh” with added laughter. Well the conversation with the first person went from bad to worse in no time. There was no way I was able to convince her that my husband was not being hateful. Whereas the conversation with the second person was full of laughter.

Moral of this story: “use chapstick”