I thought I had more time. I didn’t think it would happen so fast. There is no one home for supper except the dog, and as long as I fill his bowl, he really doesn’t care if it is just him and I for dinner. The time went so fast, I can still remember the twenty-four hours of labour for my first daughter, the twelve for my second girl and lastly the final twelve for my son. There were the diaper years, the terrible two’s (which seemed to go on for years), the teenage years, and young adult. I still have my seventeen year old son home with me but he has a girlfriend, and she comes before mom. Though when he returned from his school trip to France, his girlfriend was nice enough to wait in the car so I could receive the first hug, but then he saw her.
Okay so women are the main caregivers – is this new news, no. Women have always been the main caregivers and whose fault is that? Well it is the fault of women and men but more specifically parents, yes the ones that we are now looking after. If women want this to change then they need to start raising their boys (with the help of their spouse) to be aware that it is okay for them to be caregivers.
Some parents do already do this and I know first hand what kind of help that can be. During the last six months of my father’s life, he lived in our house, and required quite a bit of care. I would not say that I was lucky that my husband was quite helpful during this time but rather, I would say my husband was brought up to realize that whether or not he had a full-time job he was required to pitch in, in all aspects of his adult family life, which meant when I handed him the washcloth he had to wash my fathers ass because I had already washed the you know what in the front! But I digress, the one thing that this article fails to address is that the woman who is caring for her parental unit and taking the hit in her retirement savings is that one day she may require the exact same type of assistance. Then, of course, the woman’s daughter will fall into the same trap. If I am right, then I go back to my earlier statement of ‘whose fault is this?’ You would think that over so many years, us women would start to wake up and change the way things are done.