The Christmas ducks

Ever since I bought my Christmas ducks a few years ago, the teenage boy has taken it upon himself to hide the three ducklings and mom somewhere in my kitchen. As you can see from the picture one of my ducklings is missing.

Christmas ducks

It is my job to find the ducks, and put them back on the counter where they rightly belong during the Christmas season. I never know when he is going to make them disappear and it drives me crazy. The other day when I noticed them missing and the teenage boy was out, I sent him a text. This was our conversation (note: Offensive language).

Mom: Where are my ducks?
Teenage boy: Hidden.
Mom: Damn you.
Teenage boy: Ha Ha.
Mom: They better be in the kitchen somewhere?
Teenage boy: Mhm.
Mom: They better be in the kitchen, those are the rules.
Teenage boy: They are.
Mom: Damn you. I have looked and looked.
Teenage boy: I’m not giving you any hints.
Mom: Damn you. You are making me grey very fast.
Teenage boy: You’re 51. I don’t think it’s me.
Mom: You are in deep shit for that comment.
Teenage boy: Maybe I’ll buy you hair dye and a walker for Christmas. The nursing home at Sackville gives free tours.
Mom: I don’t know how to respond to that.
Teenage boy: Preferably without anymore profanity.
Mom: Fuck, fuck, and fuck.

14 thoughts on “The Christmas ducks

  1. The Backdoor Artist

    If you really want to mess with him, act like they are not missing. Rearrange the phantom ducks, dust “them” in his presence. Even better, get a friend to have a mock conversation about your wonderful Christmas ducks while he watches the two of you talk to air. It will blow his little teen brain. May even give him a gray hair or two.
    Hang in there, it gets much better at about 26-27 years old. 🙂
    Oh, be sure to check the refrigerator.

    Reply
  2. Valentine Logar

    Years ago my siblings and I bough pink flamingos and dressed them up in Christmas gear. Each year we put them in my parents front yard. They hated them, thought they were ‘white trashy’. My dad would take them down and hide them, we would find them in the night and put them back up.

    Some years my dad would throw them away, we would buy more and then we would put them in the backyard too, so all the golfers would see them as they drove by on their carts. It drove my father to profanity. We would laugh and laugh. Finally after years of this they gave up and left our flamingos alone.

    Your son is funny.

    Reply
    1. AlwaysARedhead

      I have always wanted some of those ‘pink flamingo’s! This is what make memories. I imagine if you asked your parents about the pink flamingo’s now, they might still curse but also remember the fun involved in hiding the them.

      Reply
      1. Valentine Logar

        Both of them passed, my dad in 2009 and my mom in 2008. My sister has the last set of Flamingo’s and she puts them up in her front yard every year for Christmas in memory of our parents. We miss them.

        Reply

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