Never Google Your Symptoms

No encyclopaedias here, but quite the eclectic selection, right?
No encyclopaedias here, but quite the eclectic selection, right?

I’m from that age that when you wanted information about something, and you were at home, the first thing you did was to ask your parents. The parent would then search their knowledge base, and if your mom didn’t know the answer, she would use the default answer: ‘ask your father” and vice versa. If your parents didn’t know the answer, you would head to the bookshelf, and grab an encyclopedia. (Way back when, there were door to door salesmen who sold sets of encyclopaedias. It was quite the thing – information with the flip of a page.) If you weren’t one of the lucky ones who had these books, you would then hop on your bike, and cycle over to the library. Once you arrived you would first ask the librarian for information (anything to get out of actually looking for the stuff yourself). Of course, if you were of high school age, it wasn’t cool to ask for assistance, so you would search in the index cards, where each book was filed under the Dewey decimal system.

Of course, nowadays, you have the internet, where everything is available at the touch of a keyboard. If you want to know about the corkscrew penis, just go to YouTube and search “True Facts About the Duck”The young man sent me this link, after I sent him a picture of a female Mallard at the water hole of the dog park.

So when I was driving home from the dog park the other day, and the left side of my chin decided to go numb with pins and needles, I was a tad worried. When I arrived home, the first thing I did was told my husband what was happening to me, in case I was having a stroke. I reminded him where my list of medications was, and to grab it, if we so happened to have to make a hospital run. I then went to “Google” and typed in numb chin. Seriously bad move! The first result was terminal cancer. Fuck was all I said. I decided to then alter my search terms, in hope that terminal cancer would be at the bottom of the list or not appear at all. As hoped, different results did appear, but I was still fucked according to Google. I stopped Googling.

Since my parents are no longer alive, I made myself a cup of coffee, and pondered my own knowledge base. I remembered that the husband and I, had started the day off with a bang (I’ll let you ponder what that means), and with the three bulging discs in my neck, our morning activity may have been just a bit too much for me. So I figured one of them is probably pinching a nerve, resulting in a numb chin. The next day, I went to see the doctor, explaining what had occurred, and that I still had a numb chin. He agreed that it was/is the discs causing the problem, and a MRI is a good idea, given that it has been a number of years since my last one.

Note: a numb chin is just one of the many symptoms of a stroke. If you think you are having a stroke, go directly to the hospital.

Second note: I have an MRI booked for next Monday. 

Third note: I’ve gone back to eating Cheerios for breakfast, due to my cholesterol being high again. 

12 Replies to “Never Google Your Symptoms”

  1. I would have to classify a corkscrew duck penis video as one of those internet discoveries that once seen, cannot be unseen. Thanks for doing the legwork on this Catherine!

  2. Item #1 to remember -> Never google your symptoms.

    Item #2 to remember -> Your posts almost always involve sex.

    I hope that the results of your MRI don’t tell you to stop doing what caused the problem in the first place.

    Besos Sarah.

    1. I’m glad you said “almost”, since the last one was about my garden. My MRI was fine, it’s my neck, we will just have to be more careful in our activities. 😉

  3. I’ve made the same mistake myself.I have to tell myself ‘ Step away from the Google.’……..Good Luck with the MRI and hope the numb chin (sounds a bit Chinese when said out loud) gets better soon.

  4. I always fear the worst whenever I google my symptoms. I should be dead by now, 😀 Good luck for the MRI on Monday.

  5. Honest to God!

    Just don’t do it.

    I recently had myself in a tizzy. I am a smart person. WHY would I do this to myself? Ugh!

    So, toodle-loo, Googley-goo! I am just going to be happy, move as much as I can, and keep looking forward.

    Great post!

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