The lump on my husband’s breast

A while ago, hubby noticed he had developed a small but painful lump under his right breast and told me. I didn’t necessarily panic but I did immediately phone for a doctor’s appointment and then I Googled, which of course, we all know is a bad because the first thing to come up is Cancer. Well a lot of good that does me! Luckily our family doctor saw my husband the next day, and he was referred to a specialist to make sure that the lump was nothing to worry about. We didn’t have to wait long for the appointment which is a good thing, less time for me to worry.  The specialist was especially nice and reassured us that it was probably nothing but he would take a biopsy to be sure. So right then and there out comes the needle and into my husband’s breast. As I watched I could not believe that he did not even wince from the pain, I would have screamed for sure! We could phone for the results in a week. Exactly a week goes by, and I call, one of the scariest calls I’ve made. It’s not Cancer.

Months have gone by, the lump is still there and it has gotten much larger so I phone the specialist again. The nurse is very nice and says if it has gotten bigger, my husband should definitely come in and have it looked at again. We see the specialist, it most likely isn’t Cancer but hubby should have a mammogram and ultrasound to be safe. Well, being his wife and someone who has had her boobs squished between what I would consider to be cement bricks, I naturally burst out laughing. The specialist smiled and said most wives respond that way, some sort of revenge thing. We go next door to x-ray, and glory be there is an immediate opening, as hubby shakes his head no, I say too bad, get in there and have fun. After his mammogram, hubby is only a tad bit sympathetic, but did agree, there were awkward positions he had to move in for the test. We are now waiting for the results.

The nose, wisdom teeth and the teenage boy

It was a few years ago, when middle child and the teenage boy were joking and teasing each other while in the van. After I had parked, the two of them jumped out with middle child chasing the teenage boy, both laughing hysterically. Now there was quite a bit of construction going on, on our street and there were small wooden stakes sticking out of the ground everywhere. The stakes were difficult to notice even though they were painted orange. All of a sudden the teenage boy does a face plant into the sidewalk, his foot had caught a wooden stake. Next, an ear pulsating scream came out of him. As he stood up you could see the blood, which for me is not at all good, I hurl at the sight of blood. I yell at middle child to get her older sister, as I just stand there looking at my son holding his face, I am in shock and pretty darn useless. The eldest arrives to take care of her younger brother who has chipped two of his front teeth and broken his nose! His face is swelling up and you just know, he will have two black eyes.

After the eldest has cleaned him up, I finally get my act in gear and do my motherly duty by calling our family physician and the dentist. Apparently nothing can be done for his nose until the swelling subsides which of course will take a few days, I don’t remember whether he was given prescription for the pain. An appointment is made with a Nose, Ear & Throat specialist at the hospital. In hindsight, it probably was not a good idea for me to take him to the specialist and I certainly should not have gone in with him but I did! The doctor was very nice and told the teenage boy it would be best that he had his eyes closed while he was poked with a needle into both nostrils to freeze the nose. The teenage boy agreed and closed his eyes. I, of course did not close my eyes so as soon as I saw the needle being stuck up his nostril I freaked again and yelled loudly that the needle was huge! Not good. The teenage boy opened his eyes, saw the size of the needle and started to feel a bit panicky. Amazingly though, he let the doctor put the needle in his nostrils.  Next we waited for the freezing to take hold, and then the more painful part occurred. With the doctor standing over the teenage boy his took hold of his nose and basically shoved it back in place. The doctor then told the teenage boy he would have to keep pushing his nose in place over the next week while it healed. The teenage boy did not do this.

A couple of years later, the teenage boy decided he would have his nose re-broken because he was having a difficult time breathing and he wanted it to be straight. In the meantime, he needed to have all four of his wisdom teeth pulled out. So an appointment was made for the orthodontist in August of last year. He then received the call to have his nose re-broken also in August. During the first two weeks, the teenage boy suffered horribly after having his teeth pulled, and was even more depressed because he was unable to play soccer. He had a few days of no pain, before he went in the hospital as an outpatient for his nose. The operation was very successful, but the pain afterwards was enough to bring tears to his eyes. For the following week, he had to rinse his nostrils three times daily, (just think of how painful it feels when you get water up your nose when swimming and then try doing that three times a day). For some reason, the teenage boy would not let mom or dad near him, only his sisters and best friend could be there for support when the rinsing occurred. Apparently he was mad at me because I had left him alone in the hospital for a few minutes and he assumed he was still attached to his heart monitor which was beeping like crazy. He thought he was having a heart attack, and a panic attack ensued.  For the record, he was sleeping when I left for a few minutes to walk to the other side of the hospital to have his prescriptions for antibiotics and pain medications filled. When I arrived back, I was able to calm him down and explain that he wasn’t attached to anything, the machine was just beeping because it was no longer plugged into the wall. I was still on his bad side.