The Tooth Fairy

Many parents have a difficult time dealing with “Tooth Fairy Issues”, the obvious one being how much money does the tooth fairy leave for the first tooth, but the not so obvious one is what do you do when your child uses “duct tape” to attach their tooth securely to the hand.

Our daughter was 9 years old, a fan of The Red Green Show (if you are not familiar with Red Green, well he used duct tape to fix/repair everything) and she in turn, loved duct tape too.

She was also at the age when she questioned the existence of the Tooth Fairy. Thus when she lost another tooth, and after mom & dad had gone to bed, she thought she would be a smarty pants in order to catch the so far unseen Tooth Fairy.

Under the cover of darkness, we sneakily entered her room, but much to our surprise we find streams of duct tape securely fastened to her tiny hand. What to do? Her dad tries unsuccessfully to undo the tape, trying to find the teeny-weeny tooth. Under our breath we are both laughing, and thinking how could she do this to us? After many attempts, we decide that it is useless, there is no way in hell that we are going to get the tape off her hand without waking her. Not knowing the right or wrong way to deal with this issue, we go ahead and leave money under her pillow, knowing quite well that we will have to come up with some pretty darn good answer in the morning.  In the meantime, my brain is working overtime thinking of some way to get even with her. Now, I realize she was only nine at the time, but she had really ticked me off. The answer then came to me, I would have the Tooth Fairy write her a letter explaining how bad it is to duct tape your tooth to your hand. Since she would recognize both mine and my husband’s handwriting, I decided I would get someone I worked with to write the letter.  Little did I realize what a great letter my workmate would write! So here it is:

Dear Miss G. Burden,

We have received a complaint from Tooth Fairy B46257983/P (Bruce) who is responsible for Southwestern Ontario and Erie, PA.

On or about Feb. 4, 2003 Bruce attempted to make a scheduled pickup in the pink bedroom, upper bunk at the Burden household.

Imagine his dismay when he discovered that you, Miss Burden had done what we in the tooth trade call a “RedGreen”.

Shame on you!

Our policy in cases of this sort is to leave the tooth and keep the money. However Bruce felt you must have accidentally wrapped your tooth in many layers of duct tape, and so he left you $2.00 Canadian ($1.32 US) as a token of our goodwill.

Be informed that if we do not receive your tooth in the condition it left your mouth by this Friday, our associate, the Easter Bunny will be paying you a visit. Do not make us come and get you!

Head Fairy

The next day, the letter was left under our daughter’s pillow. Well, this was a big mistake because now she not only truly believed in the Tooth Fairy but she felt the Easter Bunny was out to get her. Great, we will be voted bad parents of the year. I have no choice but to tell her the truth. There is no Tooth Fairy, yes there is an Easter Bunny and no he is not out to get you, I promise.

The letter:


8 Replies to “The Tooth Fairy”

  1. Oh no! I was hoping for a happy ever after in blissful ignorance! 😉 You should come and link this to #SunFun tomorrow – it is brilliant!

  2. Great story. She sounds like a very smart girl! It’s too bad the letter backfired – it was well intended! We haven’t yet had to face the whole tooth fairy thing (my sons are 3 and 4), but I hope to keep the belief going as long as possible.

  3. Oh no! As the mum to an almost 9 year old who is on the verge of not believing Santa, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy and everyone else, I can totally sympathise!
    I have to congratulate your daughter though, that is one smart way to try and catch you out! 🙂 (never heard of Red Green Show, I’m UK though.)
    I know I’m not going to get away with it for much longer, and hope your daughter quickly forgets the Easter bunny coming to pay her a visit! 🙂 )

  4. Oh that’s fab – don’t know what I would do – we have had a situation where the tooth has been lost before it was put under the pillow and I got dd1 to write a letter to the tooth fairy apologising so we could leave her some money!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *